Aspie-hole

Part of my Comedy Lens is that I’m a Clumsy Aspie-hole.

This take reveals two personal truths about me that I have only recently discovered:

Personal truth #1: According to a Google search and some stoner-based psychotherapy, it turns out I’m on the functional end of the Autism spectrum, AKA Asperger’s Syndrome – a neurodevelopmental condition characterized by significant difficulties in social interaction and nonverbal communication, along with restricted and repetitive patterns of behavior and interests.

So that makes me an ‘Aspie.’ It also helps explain (among other things) why I’m often curt and ‘honest’ with people (read: A-hole) instead of taking their feelings into consideration. We Aspie’s are wired to be more transactional and tend to struggle with the emotional side of life.

Personal truth #2: As tough as it is for a former wannabe athlete to admit, I’m physically (and emotionally) awkward. Literally and metaphorically. Despite looking ‘athletic,’ I trip and fall.  I bump my head on everything, and I’m always misplacing important things like my keys and friendships. I spatter so much food and flecks of whatnot that my wife calls me the ‘King of Fling.’ Yet I hate a mess.

Based on those two Personal truths, here’s my Comedy Lens now:

Mike Lukas, the clumsy Aspie-hole

It makes me laugh to watch the self-proclaimed high and mighty tumble despite their best efforts. Now in the second half of my life I finally realize…that’s me! My best humor comes from when I cop to the embarrassing fact that I never have the physical or emotional skills to live up to my own idealistic and rigid demands.

Put it this way: I see the glass as half empty and blame the waitstaff for not doing their job, but it’s actually because I bumped my elbow into the glass and spilled half the water without noticing. (Oh, clumsy Aspie-hole!)

That’s me in a nutshell, and now I’m finally willing to openly laugh about it.ie